Alternative Version of Vision Statement edited from the 11/30/11 iteration on 12/1/11.

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Vision Statement – Group Document 12/1/11 (This is not a final consensus.)
What follows is a living document that will be revised through the democratic process of the General Assembly.
From the General Assembly of the Occupy Wall Street movement, to the People of the World, we offer a Declaration of our Vision.
                  Mic Check: We are the 99%. We Will Not Be Marginalized.
             System Check: Our political and economic systems are broken. 
                           Fact Check: The Environment Is Collapsing.
                                   Reality Check: Their Will Be Change. 
We envision a truly free, democratic, and just society, built on the following principles:
Liberty:  whereby we secure the full spectrum of human rights of all – political, civil, economic, social, and cultural – against violation or infringement, particularly by unchecked corporate power and unjust governments;
People Power:   whereas governments, in any form, at every level, derive their just powers from the consent of the governed, not from individual and corporate wealth;
Participatory Democracy: whereby political, economic, and social decisions are made through a process by which everyone’s voice is heard, and no one is marginalized; 
Responsibility: whereby all who reap society’s benefits accept a fair share of its responsibilities;
Fairness: whereby political and economic institutions work to benefit all, not just a privileged few;
Peace: whereby we learn to live in harmony and embrace principles of tolerance, appreciation and respect for diversity and the differing views of others;
Equality: whereby institutionalized racism, sexism, and all other forms of discrimination and oppression based on socially constructed labels are rejected by all;
Non-Violence: whereby non-violence is embraced as a way of life, and we resolve to carry a good message when we work out our differences.
People Before Profit: whereby we value human dignity and needs over monetary gain, because when people lack a standard of living adequate for their well being, effective democracy is impossible.
Meeting Human Needs:  whereby human needs are elevated to a place of primary importance; among these are the right to meaningful and well-paid work, decent housing, comprehensive healthcare and a full education.
Earth Justice: whereby we work together to protect the global environment, to assure the humane treatment of all animals, to ensure a sustainable ecosystem for all future generations. 
                                      Mic Check: We are the 99%.
                                      Our Occupation Will continue.
                                      We Will Make This Vision A Reality.
The Working group on Visions and Goals continues to work toward a more comprehensive statement of visions and goals to be incorporated as soon as possible in this living document.
This is an official document crafted by the Working Group on Vision and Goals. The New York City general Assembly came to consensus on _________to accept this working draft and make it accessible to the public by posting in online.

2 Responses to “Alternative Version of Vision Statement edited from the 11/30/11 iteration on 12/1/11.”

  1. Natasha

    For me, there’s something off about this line: “Responsibility: whereby all who reap society’s benefits acept a fair share of it’s responsibilities;”

    Maybe something like, “whereby all who reap society’s benefits accept a fair share of responsibility for it”?

    I liked the idea of civic responsibility i put forward last week as well – maybe that can be worked in.

    I also am iffy on the term “Earth Justice”
    “Environmental Justice” / “Justice to the Environment” / “Justice to Earth” / “Earth Sustainability” / “Environmental Protection/Sustainability”

    I would also add (in caps): “whereby we work together to protect the global environment, to assure the humane treatment of all animals, AND to ensure a sustainable ecosystem for all future generations.”

  2. Rich Woytowich

    Natasha and all:

    Even though this isn’t a doc that I’m the primary editor of, I’d like to see every version of every doc be the best it can be, so that when the group chooses one or another, we can’t lose.

    So I made a couple of minor grammatical edits:
    “whereby all who reap society’s benefits accept a fair share of its responsibilities”
    “we secure the full spectrum of human rights of all – political, civil, economic, social, and cultural – against violation or infringement”

    Natasha: I hope this takes care of your sense that something was off. The wrong form of “its” was used. Your alternative wording of the “responsibility” item would also work.

    I also agree with you about “Earth Justice”. Even though this IS a vision statement, and we can think long – term, I think we need to call attention to the immediate problems we face. “Earth Justice” doesn’t do that for me. In one previous version, I tried splitting the environmental statement into two parts, one dealing with immediate needs and one dealing with a longer term vision. Maybe that would work here.

    To all:
    Some of the changed items start with “whereas” instead of “whereby”. “Whereby”, as I’ve used it, is a short – cut for “by which we mean”. “Whereas” is often used in formal declarations, but it’s usually used to state reasons for an action that will be taken. After all the “whereas” statements, there is usually a “therefore”. The document can be written either way. In this case, the “Therefore” would be our closing statements – we are the 99 percent, our occupation will continue, etc. But whichever way you write it, it shoud be consistent for all items.

    Except for the grammatical points I’ve mentioned, I have no problem with this version. By simply saying “we will not be marginalized”, you get around the problem I had with placing the blame for the mess we’re in.

    I’ll try not to poke my nose in here too often. I hope I’ve helped.

    -RIch